Who Told You That You Were A Man?

This post was originally published as a thread on Twitter. You can find the original thread here. It has been edited to correct grammar errors and to be more coherent.

Men are rightfully angry at patriarchy and the violence of the gender binary. But instead of freeing themselves they blame women, and anyone who doesn’t perform whatever idea of maleness they both worship and resent.

Men hate the role that patriarchy has coerced them into. They are told that the only way they can be respected is by selling their labor for more than the next person. Yet, they have been systematically impoverished.

Men have been told that they must win the attention of women. And in order to do so, they must sell their labor for more than the next man. Should they actually get the attention of women, they can't like it too much.

It’s impossible to please men. It’s impossible. Nothing men do will ever be good enough. They will keep moving the goal post.

Men, what is your sense of self, your pride and dignity rooted in?

You have the key to your own prison.

You will be free the moment you give up the desire to please other men. See yourself through your own eyes. You must define manhood for yourself.

Square image. Beige background. Text in a large, bold, serif font says "WHO TOLD YOU THAT YOU WERE A MAN?" At the bottom of the image is a rainbow colored collage. There are various colored heads of people with different hairstyles and head covering. Their heads are positioned in profile showing different shapes of facial features.

Men are suffering from deep self hatred and a lack of self respect. You look to other men for approval, they never ever give it to you. Nothing you do is good enough. Ever.

How are you gonna get yourself out of this?

I'm seeing tweet after tweet of men whose entire self is rooted in telling other people how to live their lives, what to do with their bodies, how they should look and speak.

Other men have convinced you that the only way for you to be a man is by telling other people who they should be. You have been convinced that the role of a man is to control the identity, body, and expressions of other people. Preferably with verbal and physical violence.

And you believed them because that same threat of violence and humiliation has been hanging over you since you were a little boy. You saw it happening to other boys, so you figured out how to be the perpetrator rather than the target of the violence…

… so you podcast and tweet and beat and assault, cause you're a real man!

You make sure all the other men can hear and see you loud & clear. "I am a heterosexual man who enjoys sex with women's anatomy. And I'll prove it with violence against anyone that threatens that fact."

From childhood until now, your entire identity has been to prove to other men that you are not gay, poor, sexless, effeminate, or weak.

Rejection, humiliation, alienation, invisibility, & a myriad of threats of and actual violence have been very effective at getting you to comply.

Look at you now.

You’ve been so worried with avoiding violence from other men that you haven’t ever figured out if you actually like yourself.

Do you like yourself independent of the opinion of other men? Who would you be if you didn’t need other men to approve of you?

Men, what is the source of your suffering?

Is it gay people? Trans folks? Children? People who want abortions?

❌❌❌
None of the above.

It's other men.

Men: Who threatens you with humiliation and physical violence? Who judges you harshly and places impossible expectations on you?

It's not trans people. It's not gay people. It's not children or people who want abortions.

It's other men.

Men: If a trans person existing moves you to violence, or to try to make them be another gender… It looks like you have no power or control over yourself. Cause why do you need to define someone else’s identity? What’s in it for you?

Men: If a woman existing in her own body as she sees fit makes you want to judge her, insult her, or be violent towards her… Sounds like you have no power or control over your own body and impulses.

Men: Can another person do with their own body as they please without you interfering or trying to control them?

Why not? What's it to you?

And if your answer is that men are innately the strongest, and that they they have a right to power over everyone else …

Just because you are imprisoned by the identity associated with your genitals doesn’t mean that everyone else is.

Many of us are getting free. You can, too.

Watch any of the documentaries on cults that are out right now. Every single one of them is led by a man who resents the expectations that patriarchy violently enforces on them.

Heaven's Gate: Led by a man who hated his gayness so much that he castrated himself. Watch the doc yourself.

NXIVM: Led by a man who out of his own mouth said that he resents the way that society forces boys to cut themselves off from their own feelings. His solution? Forcing everyone in his cult to cut themselves off from their feelings. Watch "The Vow" for yourself.

MANHOOD IS A CULT!

They created instruments to look inside the body of the person who conceived and gestated you in order to see your genitals before you were born. Based on your genitals they chose your name. When you finally exited the womb, they picked your clothes and the colors you were allowed to wear based on the genitals you have.

Before you could even focus your gaze they withheld attention and affection from you so that you would not be “spoiled” into “effeminacy”…

As you got older, they ignored your cries and told you to man up, even though you were only a 3 year old child. They rough housed with you and ignored you when you said stop so that you wouldn't grow up to be "weak."

You watched them coddle the the children assigned as girls. Ever boo-boo was kissed. Every tear was met with cuddles and hugs while you were told that boys don't cry.

By the time you went to school, you learned to perpetuate the same humiliation, emotional neglect, and demands to "man up" that you had been subject to. You learned to point out the ways other boys didn't conform to maleness. You ridiculed them, making sure you didn't slip up.

Once you hit puberty, you had already learned that your ability to get attention from girls would give you favor with and power over other boys. And if you were not interested in girls, because you were attracted to boys or just weren’t interested at all in dating, you tried your best to not garner attention from other boys. The violence would hurt you.

During puberty, as your body changed, you became self conscious about your body. You knew other boys were looking at you. You knew that your chest size, height, genitals, and body hair were all symbols of how convincingly you conformed to the cult of manhood.

Even to this day you hate your body.

You need to have the body patriarchy says you should have or the money patriarchy says you should have. And if you have neither… you aren’t a real man.

How do you feel about that?

Originally tweeted by The People's Oracle (@PeoplesOracle) on May 6, 2022.

Sidereal Pisces 2022 & Beyond

Consumed by the Search for Truth

On May 29, 2022, Mars and Jupiter will conjoin at 9° sidereal Pisces. Between now and then Sun, then Mercury, and then Venus will transit that point.

All transits calculated using the sidereal zodiac. Use this guide to cast your sidereal birth chart. If you’re ready to discover your sidereal birth chart, check out my Reading Your Sidereal Birth Chart Workshop.

Cooler dark purple circle surrounded by circular nodes connected to lines. Like, trying to connect the dots. Text in a shade of cool lavender reads: Sidereal Pisces 2022 & Beyond: Consumed by the Search for Truth, by Dayna Lynn Nuckolls

Use the info in the blog post along with the 2022 Sidereal Astrology Guide. Now 15% off with code 2022REVIEW. https://orcle.me/2022pdf

On Mars, Jupiter, and the Conjunction Relationship

Mars: What requires our energy. Where we seek to make changes. Where we are dealing with conflict. Where we establish emotional and physical boundaries. Where we set goals and act towards them. Where we figure out what we’re capable of.

Jupiter: The context for how we interpret our experiences. The area of life and/or relationships undergoing a period of redefinition. What serves as a reference point for how we understand ourselves and the world around us.

Conjunction: Ending one story or chapter and beginning another. Mars’s and Jupiter’s story is about the context that informs the interpersonal conflicts that fuel cultural change, and vice versa.

Sidereal Pisces: Wounds, Coping Strategies, and Gifts

  • WOUND – Being lied to by omission, disarmed of the ability to protect oneself.
  • COPING STRATEGY – Suspicion as protection from having the truth withheld or denied. Self doubt.
  • GIFT – Discernment as knowing who to trust, what to trust them for, and when to trust them. Intuition as trust in one’s capacity to see beyond what things appear to be. To hear between the lines of what’s said. To hear the truth in what isn’t said.

For more on the wounds & gifts of your sidereal birth chart, check The Wounds & Gifts Workshop.

The Next Chapter Begins…

A conjunction of Mars and Jupiter in sidereal Sagittarius began a series of cultural shifts on March 20, 2020. These shifts have been rooted in political conflicts that have steadily escalated since former president Barack Obama’s first term in office.

Sidereal Sagittarius transits force us to choose sides based our religious and political convictions.

  • Which side did you choose?
  • How have your beliefs about who deserves to have power changed since March 2020?
  • What do you believe those who have power should do with that power?

The next chapter begins with Mars conjoining Jupiter in sidereal Pisces. We must reconcile our political convictions with the subjective physical and emotional experience of being embodied. Circumstances demand we seek balance between the truths our bodies carry and speak, and the beliefs that comprise our religious convictions.

  • How do your political convictions support or undermine the truth of your body?
  • What do your religious beliefs say about your body?
  • What does your body say about your religious beliefs? Your political convictions?
  • Which do you believe when your body contradicts your spiritual, religious, and/or political convictions?
  • Which you trust: Your body, your religious doctrine, or your government?

The Setup

Between March 21 and March 29, the SUN sets off the degree of the upcoming Mars + Jupiter conjunction in sidereal Pisces. It asks:

  • What CONSUMES your FOCUS now? What truths do your eyes see but your body denies?

Between March 27 and March 30, MERCURY sets off the degree of the upcoming Mars + Jupiter conjunction in sidereal Pisces. It asks:

  • What is IMPLIED in and by the CONVERSATIONS you are having? What truths do your ears hear but your body denies?

Between May 3 and May 7, VENUS sets off the degree of the upcoming Mars + Jupiter conjunction in sidereal Pisces. It asks:

  • How are your CONNECTIONS demanding increasing SELF TRUST and VULNERABILITY? How is your need for connection being met during this time where it is difficult to trust others?

What to Expect in your Sidereal Pisces House

Discovering that not everything is what it appears to be.

Learning to trust your body to discern the truth about your sidereal Pisces house relationships and topics.

Your energy is focused on developing self-trust to protect yourself from being gaslit.

Conflict over the truth.

Feeling motivated to change based on non-logical, non-rational, and intangible knowing.

Establishing emotional boundaries in order to protect yourself from those who withhold or deny the truth.

Arming yourself with skepticism. You don’t believe everything you are told or everything you see.

Increasingly feel paranoid that you are being lied to.

Sidereal Aquarius: SELF-DETERMINATION

Then Sun and Jupiter have been applying towards a conjunction (coming together at the same degree + same sign) in sidereal Aquarius since mid-February.

Sun = awareness/self awareness | Jupiter = context/self trust

Planets conjunct the Sun take over the Sun. Jupiter in this position shows us overly identifying with the context while ignoring or being ignorant to the nuance of the details/data.

What is the context with Jupiter in sidereal Aquarius now?

The wound of sidereal Aquarius is erasure, invisibility, being disregarded and ignored.

Nowhere do we see this more clearly than with regard to the emerging public health policy and the way that it is disregarding, erasing, and ignoring the disabled and immunocompromised.

Sidereal Aquarius looks around at all these mirrors (individual people, communities, institutions) and does not see a reflection of their self. And this is because none of these mirrors change in response to their presence/existence. Their existence is inconsequential.

People, community, and institutions are disregarding, erasing, and ignoring the disabled and the immunocompromised. And because most folks don’t IDENTIFY with those labels, they cannot see that their experiences are the same. They don’t know that they are in danger.

Sidereal Aquarius copes with this erasure and invisibility by shrinking, self- deprecation, self-abandonment. It internalizes these wounds and sees itself that way—invisible.

The way out and thru? Self determination.

Self determination is the conjuring up of an image of self that does not rely on the mirrors (people, communities, institutions) to validate or reflect. This is a kind of self acceptance that is a direct rejection of erasure.

The mirrors are literally banking on us shrinking and internalizing the belief that we are unworthy of the dignity of life and safety.

Another side of this is humiliation being weaponized against trans children right now. They are caught up in the gaze of these institutions that are forcing them into invisibility, into abandoning themselves, + taking the eraser to their own bodies before everyone else does.

The New Moon in sidereal Aquarius is March 2

The fill-in-the-blank for this found in the 2022 Sidereal Astrology Guide say:

Establishing new definitions of myself within the context of: [insert your sidereal Aquarius house topics]”

📌 How are you learning to trust that how you see yourself is who + what you actually are, especially within the context of the overwhelming erasure of your truth by everyone and everything around you?

Originally tweeted by The People’s Oracle (@PeoplesOracle) on February 28, 2022.

2020 Deja Vu

If you’ve got your 2022 Sidereal Transits iCal or the 2022 Sidereal Astrology Guide you’ll see that both Venus and Mars leave sidereal Sagittarius for Capricorn on Saturday February 26.

The 2020 deja Vu is about to kick up several notches…

Dec 2019 + early Jan 2020 there was a massive stellium in sidereal Sagittarius. By January 23, 2020, Saturn entered Capricorn as did the Sun and Mercury. That weekend Kobe & Gigi Bryant passed a way in a plane crash, & Wuhan locked down to contain covid-19.

March 20, 2020 Mars & Jupiter conjoined in sidereal Sagittarius. Both entered sidereal Capricorn before the month ended. A cascade of shelter in place orders and travel restrictions occurred across the world.

This happened after weeks of the US government claiming that coronavirus was a mild flu.

Same thing happened December 2020 into 2021. Mask mandates lifted, unrestricted travel, assumptions of covid immunity or the “end of the pandemic…

Same thing happened December 2021 into 2022. Mask mandates lifted, unrestricted travel, assumptions of covid immunity or the “end of the pandemic…

And the same this is happening again in rapid succession.

Again, a major shift of planets from sidereal Sagittarius to Capricorn. Whatever your political convictions or religious beliefs, Covid is not over, the pandemic has not ended. This weekend begins another drop down to earth, back to reality.

We choose sides when planets transit sidereal Sagittarius.

We draw lines and boundaries of allegiance to people and places based upon the political convictions we align with. Remember, politics is about power, who you believe should have, and what they should do with it.

📌What boundaries have you drawn in your life and relationships as a show of allegiance to your religious and political convictions?

📌 What are those convictions?

When planets come to sidereal Capricorn, our convictions are tested. Not in a contest to see who is most sincere about their beliefs. This is a test to see how they hold up against the realities of material reality and survival.

Sidereal Capricorn teaches us that the material consequences of our encounters with reality define reality. Sidereal Sagittarius is the story we tell about that reality and how we interpret the consequences.

But death is death.

We tell many stories about death, but it is an irrefutable reality.

Conspiracies about how and whether or not it actually happened are as varied as they can be. But the material consequences of that encounter exist whether or not we believe it.

As Venus and Mars enter and move through sidereal Capricorn, the fervor with which we have severed, and the urgency with which we’ve pledged allegiance meets the constraints a reality. This is a reality that may have appeared to change. But that appearance is not reality…

The stories we believe about who we need and the reality of who and what is available forces us to confront contradictions that offend our convictions.

What we believe about power and the convictions that inform those beliefs must contend with the limits of material reality.

Is the pandemic over?

We’re about to find out.

Originally tweeted by The People's Oracle (@PeoplesOracle) on February 25, 2022.

Jupiter in Sagittarius 2019-2020 – Critical Mass

Jupiter is in Sagittarius during the following dates:

  • March 29, 2019 – April 22, 2019
  • November 4, 2019 – March 29, 2020
  • June 29, 2020 – November 19, 2020

All of the astrology in this article is calculated and interpreted using the sidereal zodiac. Use this guide to cast your sidereal birth chart.

There is a saying in the Gnostic Gospel of Thomas usually attributed to Jesus of Nazareth,

“If you bring forth what is within you, what you bring forth will save you. If you do not bring forth what is within you, what you do not bring forth will destroy you.”

The Gnostic Gospel of Thomas, Verse 70

To bring forth something means to come into right relationship with it. We do that by acknowledgment (I see you), recognition (I know who/what you are to me), and reverence (I honor the impact of your presence within me.) Thus, my interpretation of this oft-repeated proverb is:

When I come into right relationship with what is within me—by acknowledging it, recognizing it, and revering it—that right relationship will save me. When I am not in right relationship with what is within me, what is within me will destroy me.

This begs the question: What exactly is within me that I am beckoned to come into right relationship? Enter, Jupiter.

Jupiter in Sagittarius - Critical Mass
Dates
March 29, 2019 - April 22, 2019
November 4, 2019 - March 29, 2020
June 29, 2020 - November 19, 2020

Jupiter Marks the Seasons

There is a time and a season for all things. Astrologically speaking, Saturn defines the time and Jupiter defines the season. Just like rain in Spring is understood and functions differently than rain in Autumn, Jupiter is the seasonal context for how we interpret our experiences and the people and things in the world around us.

Jupiter in your birth chart speaks to the cultural moment you were born into and how that moment informs your identity. But as we watch Jupiter move in real-time, we observe seasonal shifts that provide changing context for experiences we have in the communities we are part of.

Jupiter articulates the uniformity of the structure of each individual human psyche, as well as the collective psyche of humans as an organism, or singular being. Jupiter articulates both its shadow and its light. The light of the psyche being the conscious self that encompasses all that we aware of and have access to seeing and knowing. And the shadow of the psyche is the subconscious and unconscious self that is just out of reach of our knowing. It is often more powerful than the conscious self because it acts outside of the command of the will.

The binary of authentic self versus inauthentic self has no place here. Instead, Jupiter draws us into communities that validate who we believe we are. That is your identity—the story of who you believe you are. 

Jupiter in Sagittarius, November 4, 2019

Because Jupiter is at home here, it’s function and significations take command of the collective conversation. And because it does not answer to any other planet’s agenda, Jupiter acts according to its own interests and demands that we do, too.

With Jupiter in Virgo 2016-17 our identities were challenged to reconsider the role of science and data in determining how we understand the world around us and form beliefs about what is right and true;

Jupiter in Libra in 2017-18 challenged long-standing precedents for the role of women in society;

Jupiter in Scorpio in 2018-19 has forced us to reckon with gun violence (in America) and climate change as the primary threat to the survival not of Earth, but that of humanity and the animals and planets humans need to thrive.

During the past few years, especially since Saturn entered Sagittarius on January 27, 2017, protest has become a global phenomenon. The fiery contagion of conviction catches wind and suddenly the streets are filled with citizens demanding that their communities, workplaces, and schools become a living testimony of their beliefs.

If Jupiter defines the season, then in Sagittarius Jupiter says that we have reached Critical Mass—tipping the scales to gain enough momentum to finally move. Just like potential energy is stored in the ball as it is pushed to and sits at the top of the hill, that energy becomes kinetic just as it reaches the edge and begins to roll. The longer it rolls, the more energy it gains.

We are now reaching the top of the hill. It’s been an arduous and difficult task. But as we’ve climbed this hill we’ve refined and acquired convictions that have propelled us to keep on pushing.

Saturn in Sagittarius has laid the foundation for the work that Jupiter in Sagittarius sets before us. Apathy and cynicism are the enemies of conviction. They spoil the healthy sense of entitlement that says, “I deserve to live in a world that reflects who I believe I am.”

But who do you believe you are? This takes us back to the saying from the Gnostic Gospel of Thomas quoted at the beginning of this writing. Jupiter beckons us to come into right relationship with what is within us. Each time Jupiter changes signs it gives us new eyes to see and understand ourselves within the context of new experiences in a changing world.

What new understandings can Jupiter in Sagittarius offer us? What context does this transit provide for us to interpret what is happening in this world and in our lives?

Bridging the Gap Between Scorpio and Sagittarius

Jupiter in Scorpio has offered us opportunities to understand ourselves and what’s happening in the world within the context of our survival as a species and our individual survival. Mars ruled Scorpio has shown us (triggered) the defensive postures we have necessarily taken on (culturally and in our personal relationships and lives) as a means to survival. But it has also given us the opportunity to try on more vulnerable postures, ones that we take on when we stand in the truth of our feelings and our needs.

What needs have you become aware of in the face of finally confronting feelings that you have avoided for so long? 

Jupiter in Sagittarius ushers in a season of focus on the role identity plays in the actions we take. The story of who you are is undoubtedly shaped by emotional experience. That’s why Scorpio comes before Sagittarius. Culturally, we say that beliefs grow from knowledge and access to information. But information is no match for experience, especially the kinds of emotional experiences that shape our brains, personalities, and how we interpret the information that we encounter. Those are the kinds of experiences that Jupiter in Scorpio brought into focus, sometimes in disruptive ways.

Bridging the gap between Scorpio and Sagittarius means understanding that you didn’t choose your beliefs, however, you can challenge them. What resonates with you as truth has more to do with the story you believe about who you are (which is your identity), rather than any book you’ve read or data you’ve analyzed. Besides, stories are better than facts.

Identity is a Belief System

What is your interpretation of the facts you perceive as relevant to making you who you are? In other words, there are things that have happened (facts), there is your interpretation of things that have happened (story), and then there is your repeated re-telling of your interpretation of those things that have happened (identity, ie what I call the dogma of identity.) Identity evolves as a consequence of how you understand your past, present, and future.

For example, “I prefer doing things myself.” Which is fine as a preference, perhaps. But it’s often more than that. That story is often rooted in experiences of abandonment or the lack of competence in our caregivers. Then, we create entire moral frameworks around that story. We develop a whole belief system around individuality and autonomy that we use to judge others and the world around us. They define our religious doctrines and our politics, too.

Where is the truth in all of that? Truth as in, what you can perceive with your own mind and being and understand with your own judgment. Everything else is dogma.

Action is the intention of the will translated through the choices we make each day. Sometimes we look back on things we’ve said or done and don’t like what those actions imply about who we are. So, we decide to tell a different story, painting the facts in a different light.

Revisionist history means to tell a story about something that happened in the past within the context of some conviction or belief of the storyteller. We see this most prominently around American slavery and war all over the world. But with Jupiter in Sagittarius (while we still have 2 more eclipses in that sign) nations all over the world are forced to come to terms with who they say they are within the context of the actions they take and the choices they make. And since individuals make up nations, it us who must take the first steps to hold ourselves accountable to the truth of who we are.

Jupiter in Sagittarius Keywords

Here is a list of keywords that will come into focus during Jupiter in Sagittarius:

  • Morality
  • Ethics
  • Integrity
  • Accountability
  • Religion
  • Conviction
  • Belief
  • Political Identity/Identity Politics
  • Teachers
  • Clergy
  • Mentors/Mentorship
  • Benefactors
  • Community
  • Church
  • Temple
  • Masjid/Mosque
  • Preacher
  • Imam
  • Rabbi
  • Monk
  • Spirituality
  • Cult
  • Culture
  • Truth
  • Revisionist History

The Work of Jupiter in Sagittarius

The following questions serve as an outline for the work Jupiter in Sagittarius provides the opportunity to undertake:

  1. Why do you believe what you believe?
  2. How do you discern the difference between fact and truth?
  3. What are your moral convictions and how do they inform your politics?
  4. How do your political, moral, and/or religious convictions determine what you believe is possible?
  5. What communities do you identify with? Why?
  6. How do the communities you identify with provide context for who you believe you are?
  7. What are the stories you tell about how and why you have become who you are, and what place do those stories have in your present reality?
  8. How has your spiritual or religious upbringing (or lack of one) shaped your understanding of your life at present?
  9. What beliefs about who you are are exposed as fallible by pressing political realities you face in your country?
  10. What beliefs about who you are are reinforced as true and righteous by the political realities you face in your country?
  11. What is the revisionist history of who you are?
  12. What is the belief you are upholding in this history?
  13. What do you lose by telling a new story?
  14. What new truths inform this new story?
  15. What does it look like for you to come into right relationship with the beliefs that define how you interpret your own actions and choices?